Four Years Today

Today, 4 years ago, Todd and I were in the hospital giving birth to our beautiful first born Karis Rose, who was born still at 38 weeks and 4 days. We went in for our regular check-up on August 28 and our doctor brought out the doppler to hear Karis' heart beating. There was no heartbeat, we did an ultrasound and still no heartbeat or movement. I can still remember the way I felt when the doctor looked at us and said I'm sorry. Later that night I was admitted to give birth.

Through all the pain and hurt and anger God was so good to us. He sent us people who loved on us, our family and dear friends and our doctor and nurses. Our doctor sat with Todd, crying with him and just being with him. We did not realize at the time how many people were praying for us all over the United States. God is so good.

We had chosen the name Karis Rose from the moment we found out we were having a girl. We prayed that she would be a girl/lady of grace and inner beauty. Even though our prayers were not answered the way we wanted we have still seen them answered. That was a huge blessing to us to know that God did answer our prayers. Sometimes those prayers are not wrapped in the package we have in mind.

The day we arrived home from the hospital Todd wrote this poem for our daughter.

We offered our prayers.

Night and day those prayers arose

To heaven's throne. He heard our voice,

And God planted a Rose.

We gave our hearts

To love, though the Rose we could not see.

In faith and fear

We dreamed of all that she would be.

We prayed God's grace

For grace in her to be known.

And for beauty

That would come form the depths of her soul.

But God's dreams are greater

Than any we could conceive.

His plans are always good and right;

This we must believe.

And in the midst of dryness,

God's tears fell with our own,

As He chose for Himself the beauty He made.

God picked the Rose.

Today Todd and I, because of the grace of God, can enjoy talking about our little girl. Every night in our prayers we can thank God for giving us Karis for the time we had her. Thank you Lord for Your strength and Your love and Your grace in our lives.